The biggest political marketing campaign in the history of the world has been going on now for well over a decade. It’s an emotional campaign. It’s a ruse. Its sole intention is to make you feel guilty, to scare you into becoming a reactionary. The politically-owned media wants you to be on Stormwatch or freaking out about a heatwave every day of the year.

Earth is getting hotter. So what? Your four-wheel-drive truck that gets four miles per gallon didn’t cause it and the nuts toolin’ around in the electric golf carts won’t fix it. Remember the Ice Age? Well, guess what? At some point, earth got hotter and all the ice melted, so I guess it was fuckin’ hot then too.

The planet is millions and millions of years old and we’ve been documenting verifiable weather statistics for maybe 200 years. Europe’s getting hotter, there’s record-breaking heat in Death Valley. So fuckin’ what. It was 150 degrees in Death Valley 5,000 years ago too but there was no fuckin’ weather man around to tell you.

How come nobody cares about the dinosaurs becoming extinct because of climate change, but we’re suicidal when the Delta Smelt’s water gets one degree hotter? It’s because some people are easily brainwashed, and because the reactionary media gets better ratings if they can get inside your head.

The weather patterns have been wiping out species since the beginning of time and for every insect that bit the dust, another insect appeared to bite you when you sleep or terrify you when you get into the shower.

Don’t worry about these bugs, don’t think about the Spotted Owl or the fuckin’ Panda. You can’t save ’em and your mom’s hairspray or that wood bonfire you had at Doheny Beach isn’t killing them.

You drive a fuckin’ Tesla, recycle your cans and you only run the damn washing machine at night … and the 1.35 billion Chinese are filling the ocean with raw sewage and driving a bazillion cars that don’t get smog checked. Who wins in a contest between your ability to recycle and an entire continent that could care less about pollution because they’re too busy trying to feed themselves?

All the while, you’re paying the highest taxes in the history of the civilized world and being radically inconvenienced at every turn with rules and restrictions and bogus policies because the social justice types have a god complex and think they control the planets and the stairs and nature’s heating and cooling system. And you pay the price for this delusion.

Don’t be a sap. The earth is getting hotter, these things run in cycles. The political energy being spent to make you think you can stop it is a socialist plot to generate tax revenue. It’s all a part of a mass movement to redistribute wealth, to funnel every possible dollar into social programs so that nobody has to work anymore or be responsible for themselves.

If you wanna give all your money to homeless people or sponsor heroin addicts that’s your business, but don’t get guilt-tripped into it because some politician makes you feel that you need to make amends for how you (mankind) caused global warming.

It’s gonna be fuckin’ hot today, it’s not your fault. Some random fish is gonna swim his last today, it’s not because of your leafblower. A little ice is gonna melt today, it’s not because of the vapor trail from the thirty cigarettes you smoke every day.

You’re basically a good person, you didn’t change the climate. You can’t fix it. And you shouldn’t be forced to give money and sacrifice your civil liberties to people who say you can. I thought you should know.

Photo credit: rcbodden on Best Running /CC BY