If you have to fire someone at a small company, the process is pretty straightforward, informal, just point and shoot. It goes something like, “Hey man, I’m gonna have to let you go. I’m giving your job to my girlfriend’s son, he’s kind of a dumbass, but I’ll get more sex this way. Sorry. But it works out kinda good because you’re not eligible for paid vacation until your 366th consecutive day on the job and you’ve worked here 364 days, so no vacation check, sorry. It’s not personal, oh ya, today’s your last day, I mean right now’s your last day. We would have taken you to a last-day lunch but the guy replacing you will be here in fifteen minutes. I feel bad, here’s twenty bucks, go get Bunch-A-Lunch at Shakey’s. Good luck bro.”
Firing people works differently at a big company, it’s more awkward (If you can believe that) and complicated.
