We should all praise the Lord for any athletic event or natural phenomenon that saves us from having to watch professional basketball. For two weeks we have been distracted by the Winter Olympics, with every American male living in absolute fear of encountering a room full of women watching figure skating – but it’s better than basketball, so praise the Lord!
Well, the Sports-We’re-No-Good-At Games have started. Were you just a little bit embarrassed when the Americans trotted out at the opening ceremonies with 250 snowboarders and engulfed the one little athlete from Trinidad and Tobago in an unprecedented selfie-absorbed display? The guy from Trinidad had a flip phone and more the one dude on Team USA thought he was a server and asked him to fetch a cocktail. Maybe I’m just easily embarrassed. I’m watching the Winter Olympics anyway for mostly the same reason all men watch the Winter Olympics – to see attractive Scandinavian women.
Did you ever go to a track meet? I’m not suggesting it or anything. They used to call what is now termed track & field, athletics and a day at a meet, watching people generally get out of breath and toss around weighted objects isn’t for everyone. I’ve been to high school meets (you too probably) and professional indoor meets and pretty epic dual meets between two collegiate teams, but I was not prepared for the alien life forms I encountered at a meet one day not so very long ago.