Football players can’t get their own drinks. It’s odd. They appear coordinated but they can’t seem to master the intricate interplay between helmet, drinking device and mouth so universities have to hire dozens of waiters and waitresses to mingle with the players with the sole duty of squeezing streams of liquid through facemasks and into parched little throats.
I found reference material that asserts there are fifty-three edible nuts. I wasn’t actually looking for nuttiness, it found me (I need to make that clear). The list is interesting and I think we should discuss it, but I can tell you right off the bat that, while there may technically be fifty-three kinds of nuts you can eat, there are really only four that deliver any kind of eating satisfaction whatsoever. In order to provide clarification, I have included a photograph of three of the four (the pistachio refused to be photographed for this article).
It is “a decisive moment in the history of Western civilization.”
The Times, a British daily, on the release of The Beatles’ Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band
When I was a boy The Beatles had their own Saturday morning TV cartoon. The cartoon Fabs had big noses and the famous haircuts, and every episode was essentially the same: one of the four (usually Ringo, great actor that Ringo) would do something out of bounds on the way to a concert, putting the band in a bind, whereby they would be chased by screaming girls and law enforcement. Naturally, the Liverpudlians made the gig just in time and the shenanigans would end with a song. I always wondered why all the Brit cops were named “Bobby.”